Today is my birthday. [Golf clap.] I’m officially too old to be writing for this blog. Moving on.
Consider this my obligatory, quite random and uninspired response to the Tiger Woods’ apology: It was boring, about as interesting as watching golf on television. Like, seriously. How can I take voyeuristic pleasure in something so…um, vanilla [talking about the speech, not Woods’ taste in women]? For a guy who sends such racy text messages, I was expecting a much more electrifying statement. If Tiger Woods had read from his Blackberry I assure you all that his apology would have actually been worth talking about. Maybe he should’ve used Autotune. Is there an App for animating an otherwise mundane statement by a professional athlete?
How much more satisfying would it have been if Woods had just walked up to the podium and said, “My wife made me do this…”?