When I fall in love it will be forever
Or I’ll never fall in love
In a restless world like this is
Love is ended before it’s begun
And too many moonlight kisses
Seem to cool in the warmth of the sun
When I give my heart it will be completely
Or I’ll never give my heart
And the moment I can feel that you feel that way too
Is when I fall in love with you.
—Written and Composed by Nat King Cole—
How do you know when you’re in love? How do you know if the person who’s holding your hand speaks the thump, thump, (skip a beat) thump language of your heart? Do they exude the rhythmic and vocal complexities of Ella Fitzgerald and Louie Armstrong crooning “Baby, its Cold Outside?” Or is it more like Jordan Sparks’ and Chris Brown’s ballad[ized] (yes, I made up a word) “I can’t breathe without you . . . no air?” Or is it more like falling into Kurt Ellings’ Leaving Again, In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning.
Furthermore, what are the tell tale signs of someone in love? Do they visit their beloved Facebook’s profile during the day just wanting to see a picture of them knowing that if the relationship ever ended and Facebook decided to be “gangster” listing how many times people visit their friends’ profile, they would appear to be cyber-stalkers? Or, is it when she is up in the wee morning hours trying to write a blog about a new study published in the International Journal of Obesity detailing how fat around the thighs and derriere area are great health benefits only to find that she’s unable to focus on writing her piece because she has just realized that she has fallen in love with someone who she is no longer in relationship with? Perhaps, it’s all these things give or take a long endearing walk in the park at twilight or a nearly silent hand embrace as your beloved drives.
If you cannot tell this blog is about falling in love because for the last couple of weeks, I’ve written about really deep and at times emotionally and politically draining topics which like all things have their season of advent. However, I want to write about love or at least the act of falling in love because it can be healing and restorative. Just think what would happen if the World Bank or the International Monetary Fund fell in love with the countries they loaned money to? Perhaps, they would absolve the country of all their debt because when you’re in love you do cute things to make your beloved smile. I know I said this was not a political blog per se, but I could not resist.
Okay, how about one more political example? Just think what would happen if the Word Food Program, and CNN reporters fell in love with Haiti? Wow, they would not demonize the Haitian people for
wanting to feed themselves and wanting to feed their families and they would not allude to “I heard gun shots” instead they would as all great lovers do embrace their partner with the intention of healing their ailing spirits. And the word “looting” would be akin to saying, “I hate you, my love.” Okay, that was my last political example, just had to say it.
Well, I love to use songs to talk about falling in love because they convey the wellspring of what it means to fall in love beginning with the composition of the first date only to crescendo realizing that you have moved beyond simply enjoying this person’s company to actually “longing” for their presence. Yep, it is a slippery slope, but one I think we all need to experience because it teaches us how to simultaneously be vulnerable and caring. And just in case you’re wondering, yes I’ve fallen in love at least four times in my twenty plus years of life. It’s a wonderfully happy and at times wonderfully sad process depending on the longevity of the relationship, but it’s a wonderful feeling to have now-a-days when there is so much injustice and misery in the world. So, I ask: When was the last time you fell in love? How did it feel? Did you do silly things to make your beloved smile? Did you friends make fun of you for being so “sprung?” (Yep, I took it back all the way to the 90s using the word sprung)