“If I’m in yo city, I’m signing them tig-o-bitties.” –Nicki Minaj, 2010

When Kanye called for a sort of moratorium on gay-bashing he was simply talking about blatant disregard (i.e. calling a man a “bitch” or a “faggot.”) What he wasn’t doing is starting a revolution in hip hop to love thy neighbor as his faith (Christianity) and his Jesus piece would suggest. He was simply making room for pink polos, skinny jeans, and auto-tune. Besides, few people are swayed to love or defend homosexuals because of some deep inner calling to basic human rights. Instead, they are often, as was Kanye West, pulled by shame or after someone near and dear to them comes out–someone they find truly necessary to their lives. In Kanye’s case, I would argue it was his stylist and not his cousin. Well guess what? MLK needed Bayard. What else is new? Which is why hip hop’s brand of back door gays deserves no applause. Been there, done that.

I am a person who deals well with contradiction (black nationalists typically hate black people; feminists often love Biggie Smalls). But hip hop is not a vehicle for gay rights and never will be. If there is little room for an R&B fag (RIP Luther) then there is definitely no place for a mainstream homosexual artist (I’m talking top 40). No disrespect Deep Dick Collective. While we as an audience may be able to expand our minds to what a straight male rapper can talk about and look like (i.e. Kanye West) there will never be a gay male rapper spitting “give me that bobby” and certainly not an audience singing along. It. Will. Not. Happen. I say this because recently a very sexual Nicki Minaj proclaimed in a recent Details interview that she believed a gay male rapper would exist in her lifetime. And while she may be a little ditzy, she is certainly no dummy. What she has failed to realize, is that bi-sexuality has always been acceptable in hip hop. It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none. And if you are a bi-sexual, the homies can have some. There will never be some butch woman rapping about strapping. Never. And if she even did, the Boule would get that ass.

If hip hop were truly threatening to take us there and they aren’t, then Nicki Minaj would look like this:

and not like this: She would be a hoodie-wearing full-fledged lesbian (stereotypical, i know) and not some safe, Lil’ Kim replay with plastic surgery, panties and heels. If hip hop were really trying to bring it, Nicki Minaj would not ever have a menage unless it were with two chicks and a prosthetic. But hip hop is not there. And we aren’t either. Don’t get excited by Kanye or Nicki. They simply know, like everyone else, that simple boy on girl sex is about as tired and vanilla as dry humping. For every one time Kanye has worn tight jeans and blogged about gay designers there are another two times he’s shown up with a 40 ounce, a bandana, and a white-girl. And so it goes–one step forward, two steps back.