The Issue with Black Love
I grew up in a house with two loving parents. My mom and Dad have been together for 26 years now and I don’t think they’ve left the honeymoon phase of their relationship yet. So I’ve never been confused about the notion of Black Love. To me, it was always a Black woman and a Black man involved in the equation. Once I got older and experienced other things, the equation expanded to involve two Black people who are in a loving, nurturing relationship. Never have I considered expanding that idea to include non-Black people. However, many people thought that Essence was doing just that by putting New Orleans Saints’ running back Reggie Bush on the cover of their Black Love Issue.
Reggie Bush’s relationship with Kim Kardashian is highly publicized and quite honestly, I could care less who he chooses to be with. The discussion that occurred on Twitter (of all places) is what interests me about this entire situation. Many Black women were confused and some were outright angry that Essence had chosen a Black man who is in an interracial relationship to cover an issue that is dedicated to Black Love. I can’t fault them for this. But the response from the Black men on Twitter was bothersome. Of course they were calling the women who complained bitter, saying that they should step outside of the idea that Black Love is so restrictive, that this is a perfect opportunity to expand the idea of Black Love even further so that it is not so exclusive.
If we continue to expand the notion of Black Love so that it includes interracial relationships, the concept begins to erode, particularly, for Black women. We are the ones who will be pushed to the margins if the concept is expanded. Men are privileged enough to tell us that we shouldn’t be so concerned about our fading presence in the Black Love equation which simultaneously pushes the idea that we aren’t qualified to be in the equation at all. Where does that leave us?
If you’re interested, here are some other bloggers speaking on the topic:
A Dissertation on Black Women
A Response to that Dissertation
Deep Cover
Yes, I agree with this 100%, I am shocked everytime I see this I live in Pittsburgh PA and this is all you see is white women and black men, I lived in Denver CO this is what you see and I am surely not excluding black women of this but of course we all know black men take the cake and it’s not cute I am not bitter or jealous not one bit this is not a matter of selfishness but a matter of history for me and the natural beauty of an african man or women we are to the point of taking what we can get as to say who is black, if you are mixed then this what you are we have as a black community and are telling ourselves that Halle berry, Mariah carey, and Barack are black and that would make a white women as equal to you as far as what can be produced so then you have to say, then what are we black women needed for?
Some Black men and Black women have so easliy let white into our homes and lives, and are being told we are not worth shit, I see so many fine, beautiful black women and even here we go bi-racial women and some how we cannot amount up to white women, I fill ashamed alot of times even embrassed of these men and women who do this we are losing Africa to the caucasin when will we show strengh when will we show unity and teach our dons and daughters it ok to be black, it’s ok if your hair is nappy, it’s okay if your skin is dark that’s going to be gard when everytime you look around you see your brothers and sister white a white man or women.
We are becoming smaller and smaller you cannot grow or continue to survive if we are always mixing I look at my son and think is he going to do this because it’s going to be sure hard because it would break my heart, I what to see black granddaughter and black little boys I can spend my time with and teach about life and whatever else if he brought home a mix child I would love him or her my heart would yearn for a black grandbaby.
So I will say black men if you were women I would pimp you guys because y’all are all too easy
Yes, I agree with this 100%, I am shocked everytime I see this I live in Pittsburgh PA and this is all you see is white women and black men, I lived in Denver CO this is what you see and I am surely not excluding black women of this but of course we all know black men take the cake and it’s not cute I am not bitter or jealous not one bit this is not a matter of selfishness but a matter of history for me and the natural beauty of an african man or women we are to the point of taking what we can get as to say who is black, if you are mixed then this what you are we have as a black community and are telling ourselves that Halle berry, Mariah carey, and Barack are black and that would make a white women as equal to you as far as what can be produced so then you have to say, then what are we black women needed for?
Some Black men and Black women have so easliy let white into our homes and lives, and are being told we are not worth shit, I see so many fine, beautiful black women and even here we go bi-racial women and some how we cannot amount up to white women, I fill ashamed alot of times even embrassed of these men and women who do this we are losing Africa to the caucasin when will we show strengh when will we show unity and teach our dons and daughters it ok to be black, it’s ok if your hair is nappy, it’s okay if your skin is dark that’s going to be gard when everytime you look around you see your brothers and sister white a white man or women.
We are becoming smaller and smaller you cannot grow or continue to survive if we are always mixing I look at my son and think is he going to do this because it’s going to be sure hard because it would break my heart, I what to see black granddaughter and black little boys I can spend my time with and teach about life and whatever else if he brought home a mix child I would love him or her my heart would yearn for a black grandbaby.
So I will say black men if you were women I would pimp you guys because y’all are all too easy
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Thank you for posting this great blog. Visit my very own!
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I appreciate all of the information you provided.